History(as told by
Shantilli):
My name is Shantilli. Weird, huh? According to my
Father, my Mother picked it. Sometimes I wonder if my Father,
Benedict (Prince of Amber, Protector of Avalon, Lord of All,
etc..........) didn't pick it, but is too "manly" to
admit it. Either way, it's mine and I'm stuck with it. I can't
ask my Mother about it, because, according to my Father, she's
dead. I can't say. All I know is that I don't remember her.
I grew
up in Avalon, rather, a shadow of the shadow of Avalon, where my
Father was the "Protector." I'm not sure whether my
Mother was a native or not; I don't think she was, because(if she
really did chose my name) there was no one else in that shadow
named Shantilli. Lots of Arthur's and Lancelot's and Ginny's. No
Shantilli's.
Anyway,
I lived in a manor house. It was very boring. Oh, sure, there
were horses and orchards and stuff, but it all gets rather dull
after a while. Father was always off at war and I was left in the
care my evil governess, Lora. She was fat and jolly and used to
make me eat oatmeal every morning for breakfast.
I
really hated oatmeal.
Then
there was Master Tamlin. He taught me to read and write, as well
as mathematics and religion.
I hated
him only slightly more than Lora.
When I
was fifteen my Father appeared(he had recently won some great
battle or whatnot) and told Lora that he wanted me to learn
swordplay. I wasn't particularly interested in weaponry, but I
went with his wishes. After all, Father was, literally, a God.
Besides, if I did well maybe he would be proud of me for once.
He was
very disappointed with the result.
The
first time my Father saw me fence, all he had was criticism. My
knees should have bent more. My parry sixte was sloppy. I didn't
act upon obvious openings.
I was
daunted, but not discouraged. I wanted Daddy to be impressed.
He
left, and I practiced more. He returned four months later with a
whole new round of "observations."
I
didn't give up. My determination was undoubtedly inherited(along
with those nifty Pattern genes) from my Father. I pursued fencing
with a vengeance. Learned every trick the masters of Avalon had
to teach me.
I
wanted to impress my Father.
After
seven years of pursuing the blade and other weapons of warfare,
he remained unimpressed and I gave into a hopeless despair.
My
Father, I had decided, wouldn't pay me a compliment if his life
depended on it. He was absent and, as far as I was concerned,
soulless.
That
was when I left Avalon. Sort of.
My
Father had left the day before, returning to the battle field
which was his one true love, and I was riding, brooding over his
latest set complaints about my fencing technique.
That
was when I met him. Tall, with flame colored hair and emerald
eyes, he stood, holding the reins of a gorgeous white stallion,
blocking my path. He was different, that I knew the instant I saw
him. Something else entirely. Something other worldly.
I sat
there, atop my own horse, waiting for him to move. He didn't,
however, but he turned his gaze toward me and met my eyes and
smiled.
Finally,
after no words had passed between us, I said, "Let me
pass."
Without
a word, he mounted his horse and began to ride. "Follow
me," he called over his shoulder.
It was
probably the stupidest thing I had ever done in my life, but,
strangely, I had never been cautioned against strangers. Of
course, common sense should have told me to ride away from him
like the Devil himself was at my heels. Many people would argue
that Brand was the Devil.
The
changes were subtle. I didn't notice them at first. The sky was a
little darker, the shrubbery oddly shaped. It wasn't until the
dirt path beneath me turned to stone that I stopped and looked
back.
The
familiar path was gone, replaced by a road of gray.
He
never faltered, but called back, "I wouldn't stop if I were
you - Less you wish to be left here."
I
spurred my horse forward. "Who are you?"
I
couldn't see his face, but I would swear that he was smiling.
"You'll find out soon enough."
It was
then that I recognized my folly. Glancing behind I discovered
that the path had vanished entirely, the ash colored stone
starting several feet behind me.
I
panicked and drew upon the reins, jerking my mount to the left,
then kicking it into a run.
"Wait!"
he cried behind me. I urged my mount to go faster. We plunged,
blind through the unfamiliar underbrush.
Suddenly,
a bird the color of blood appeared before us, wailing horribly.
The horse reared, throwing me.
Dazed,
I sat on the ground, watching as my horse fled into the dark
forest.
Weeping,
I sat there, listening for familiar sounds. There were none.
Finally, I arose and made my way through the bushes.
After
an hour, the trees and shrubs began to thin, leading to a rocky,
almost mountain like terrain, unlike anything I knew of in
Avalon.
That
was when it touched me. A trump contact, the first of it's kind
that I had ever felt, tugging at the edges of my mind. I stopped
and tried to focus on my surroundings, which were beginning to
fade........
Then,
suddenly, the contact exploded around me! If my Father was the
God of Warcraft, then this man certainly was the God of the
realms of the Mind.
I stood
there, open mouthed, unable to comprehend exactly what had
happened.
He
reached for me.........
Instinct,
thankfully, took over and I dodged him, moving backwards. I tried
to run, but no matter which way I turned the contact was there.
That was when he cursed and a knife appeared in his hand,
seemingly out of thin air.
I
jerked to my left, trying once again to elude this man who seemed
to live in my mind.........
I felt
myself fall.
God! I
thought. I had stepped right off a cliff!
Maybe I
screamed, I really don't remember. There was a sharp pain in my
head, then blackness. No mountain in a strange world, no red
haired man locked in my mind, nothing.............
When I
awoke I hurt. My head most of all, but ribs and my left leg as
well a shoulder seemed to have sustained some injury.
Dazed,
I sat up. There was Lora, who, though I was twenty-three, was
still watching over me. Gently, she put a hand on my shoulder and
kept me from sitting up.
I
looked around. I was in my bed, back home in Avalon.
Lora
was happily yammering about how quickly I had recovered and how
worried everyone had been after I had been missing a week.
A week?
I had only been out riding for an hour or two, even including my
following the stranger. I couldn't possibly have been unconscious
for a week..........
How had
I gotten back to Avalon? What had happened to the red haired man?
Where I had been? How had he taken me there?
I
closed my eyes. Too many questions, too few answers. Besides, I
was so tired............
When I
awoke, my Father was there, sitting in a chair at the side of my
bed. He looked angry.
Our
eyes met.
I
smiled weakly. "Hi, Dad," I said.
He sat,
silent, staring at me. "What happened?" His voice was
very soft.
I
laughed, then winced as the vocal movement sent knives through my
mind.
"Something
really strange........." I went on to explain it then, going
into detail. Every thing from the man on the horse, to fleeing
into the forest, to the strange "illusion" cast in my
mind.
"Only,
it was very real," I said. "When he reached for
me........I.....I thought he could really grab me. I tried to
run, but it didn't do any good. Then I fell over the ledge and
there was nothing but darkness."
He just
sat there, staring at me. I was waiting for him to tell me how
stupid I was to follow a strange man into the woods, but he said
nothing.
Then,
after several minuets had passed, he reached into his pocket and
withdrew an ornate little box. He opened it and withdrew a number
of cards, all of which had a unicorn painted on the back.
He
selected one and showed it to me. It was the red haired man
astride a white horse, clothed in green. The man, not the horse.
"Is
this him?" My Father's voice was very quiet, as if he was
afraid of the answer.
I
replied, "Seems to be."
Very
slowly, he put the card back in the ornate little box, then put
the box back in his pocket.
"Who
is he?" I asked.
"Later.
You need to rest."
I
sighed. I wanted to argue, but I knew that it would be useless. I
never did find out what Brand wanted with me, or why he never
contacted me again. My fear is that he planned to use me as
Pattern Eraser Fluid - like what he did to Martin.
In the
next few weeks I recovered, my fractured leg, cracked shoulder,
and split head melding back together.
Two
weeks after I was completely healed, my Father asked me to go
riding with him. I was perplexed - father/daughter bonding wasn't
real big with him. I went anyway.
He led
the way - over the river and through the woods and all that.
Abruptly, we left the woods and came upon this field(actually, it
was a plain now that I think about it) that didn't exist anywhere
near the manor house in Avalon.
I
didn't ask questions though - he doesn't like that.
We rode
a little longer, and this elaborate picnic lunch appeared. We
stopped and ate and talked. Rather, I ate and he talked.
He told
me all sorts of things - about Amber, Shadow, Chaos, Trumps, the
Pattern. We sat and I memorized the names and faces of those
depicted on the tarot cards.
I guess
you could say that we bonded. I realized that he really did care
about me and I put my hatred aside, to be assessed at a later
date.
We
fenced and, though he was still a lot better than I was, he told
me that I was doing well. I beamed. I was happy that he was
proud.
Then we
rode back to Avalon and I slept. When I awoke he called Gerard
and I walked the Pattern.
I spent
another few weeks with my Father, learning to shift shadow, then
he left saying that WHEN I get in trouble, I should call either
him or Gerard with the trumps.
Silently
laughing(I felt invincible), I watched him go.
The
next years were the best. Nothing, but wandering from shadow to
shadow. As much adventure or romance or peace as I wanted. No one
held me down, no one ordered me around. There were no rules and
reality bent to my will, shaping and re-shaping it's self to my
desires.
I
became a vagabond of a sort, never staying in one shadow too
long. An affair here, a battle there. Along the way I acquired my
sword, Talshan.
Then I
came across Earth. I later learned that my Uncle Corwin as well
as my Aunt Florimel had dwelled there(were dwelling there) for
years, which was why it had called to me the way it did.
I came
there and was overwhelmed. Never had I come across such a place.
I was country girl, who had sought out country shadows. The
technology baffled as well awed me, as did the inhabitants. I
wandered the streets of San Francisco for months, learning the
language and the society. When I felt ready, I bought some forged
documents and became an American citizen, my official name
Shantilli Lora Avalon. Needless to say, I did not often tell
people my full name.
It
didn't matter. They all called me Shawn. It was the beginning of
the era known as the sixties, and I was happy.
Swordplay,
there, was different than back home. I had been taught simple,
deadly techniques. On Earth they practiced fancy moves and fought
with masks and vests and rubber tipped swords.
It was
incredible.
I got a
job at the local university teaching remedial math classes.
Later, once I had picked up the "conversational" blade
techniques, I started teaching fencing three days a week, too.
San
Francisco was incredible. Rather, Earth was incredible. The
music, the people......it was all so different.
I lived
in a studio apartment with my marijuana plant, Beuford. Despite
my plant life, I stayed away from drugs. Multiple bad experiences
had sent me on strange journeys through shadow.
Years
later, I was at the theater seeing some dopey opera(Andrew, my
date, had bought the tickets. He was rich, but I didn't like him
much. I think he felt the same way about me.) when I got a trump
call.
At
first, I hadn't known what it was. Just a strange, subtle buzzing
in the back of my mind then logic took over. I excused myself in
the middle of an act and slipped into the empty bathroom about
the time the call came through.
My
father stood on the other side of the contact. Where he had
gotten a trump for me, I don't know. He wasted no time on
pleasantries.
"Your
grandfather is dead and I want you to come here. Now."
I
blinked. "What?"
He
narrowed his eyes and repeated, slowly so I would be sure to
understand,
"Your.......grandfather......is....dead....and...I.....want...you...to....come....
here. Now."
I just
stood there, mouth agape. "Now?!"
He
nodded, looking more annoyed.
"Gezz.
I've got stuff here - a life. Don't I get any time to straighten
things up? Besides, my trump deck is at home. You don't want me
leaving that, do you?" It was then that I noticed he only
had one arm.
He
continued to look annoyed. Finally, "I will call you back in
twenty-four hours. Get a sword, your trumps, and some armor. Be
ready then."
"Yes,
sir." I said, like the good little soldier, but he was
already gone.
My
watch read 7:42.
I
slipped back into the theater and told Andrew that I had a family
emergency and had to leave. Reluctantly, he offered to drive me
home. I said that I would take a cab, then left, a tenor singing
off key with the beat of a drum.
It was
8:30 by the time I got home. I immediately began to pack things
up.
At 9:45
I knocked my next door neighbor's door. Dee Dee answered, her
stringy blond hair hanging over her face, her breath smelling of
alcohol.
I told
her that I had a family emergency and had to leave the country. I
asked if she would take care of Beuford for me, then(after she
had said yes) offered her all my electronic equipment.
She
cursed a lot and cried, sucking on a bottle of gin, while I moved
my TV, radio, and such into her apartment.
I spent
all night collecting things.
That
morning I delivered them.
My
science fiction and fantasy books went my friend Karen, who was
into that sort thing. Mystery novels were dropped off at the
library. I gave my ex-lover Mike(who was now my friend) my
collection of chess boards(marble playing pieces, gold and silver
inlay, you name it, I had bought it). I knew that he would
appreciate them.
I
donated my collection of antique costume jewelry to the museum,
as well as gave them all the money in my bank accounts. My
clothes went to Cassandra, who was almost my size and my shoes
were given to Nicole Brewster, who lived on 22nd street.
Everything else was given to Goodwill or left in the apartment to
rot.
I
looked out at San Francisco and wondered if I would ever return.
At
exactly 7:42 my Father called. I was ready and waiting, wearing
dark armor and my sword, Talshan, at my side. He brought me
across and asked if my fighting skills had improved any.
I said
they had.
We
sparred and, I think, I may have impressed him. I was still no
where near his level of skill, but my years on Shadow Earth had
given me practice.
With a
nod, he sheathed his sword and told me of everything which had
transpired. From Corwin's return, to Brand's final, mad move.
He said
that my Grandfather, Oberon, was dead, though the others did not
yet know that. (He chose not to tell me how he knew that)
That
was the day of the final battle in the Patternfall War.
An hour
after my Father and I spoke I was, Talshan in hand, fighting on
the front lines against the forces of Chaos.
Never
before had I killed so many. Never before had been so afraid.
I
didn't get to see the final confrontation with Brand. I was back
with the rest of the army, scared and trying not to break down
and cry. The Great Storm was upon the horizon and death seemed
certain.
Then,
when there seemed no time left, we were lead into Chaos to wait
out the storm.
I left
then, no words to my Father. I had never fought like that. Oh,
sure, I had killed, but never on such a grand scale. It showed me
why he was the way he was. No one who spent most of their life
(and he is very old) killing people could hold on to their soul.
I spent
a month, shadow time, a place called Gerselle. Peaceful people.
Then I
left, unsure of where I was going. I didn't feel like roaming in
shadow, so I returned to Earth, but not to San Francisco.
Instead, I went to Los Angles, the City of Angles, changing my
name to Shawna Chaos Reeves.
I
didn't like Los Angles, or Chicago, which was my next stop. After
a couple tries of trying to integrate myself into small towns in
Indiana, I was ready to give up on good ol' shadow earth.
Then I
came across New York.
Never
before had I come across a city. Beautiful and deadly, new, yet
ruined. I was entranced. I don't know why, but I stayed.
Getting
forged immigration papers was as easy here as it had been in each
of the other cities. Going by the name of Shawnali Amber
Gerselle, I got a job teaching archery and fencing at NYU.
I feel
in love with Broadway and an aspiring actor/singer, Nathaniel
Roberts.
I loved
him.
We were
happy - I actually married the man. I never told him about my
family or shadow or any of the magic contained therein.
Then he
died. Not of old age as one might suspect, but he was killed.
He had
been playing the part of Tony in "West Side Story." It
was the last scene in which Chino appears and shots Tony as
he(Tony) rushes into Maria's arms. A stage gun is used, one that
emits smoke and makes an audible pop as it fires a blank which
doesn't even penetrate clothing.
Someone
put a real bullet in the gun.
It was
strange, sitting there in the audience, watching him fall, then
hearing the actress who was Maria screaming that their was
"real blood." Then Nathan had begun to call my name. I
rushed on stage.
In
short, he was dead before the ambulance arrived, dying in my arms
in a theater in Dallas.
They
never discovered whether it was an accident, or if the gun had
been deliberately loaded.
I left
Earth after that and went, for the first time since I walked the
Pattern, to Amber, where Random was King.
Amber,
my homeland no matter where I was born.
The one
true realm.
Return to the Mis. Amber Fiction page!